TEST YOUR KNOWLEDGE OF SYRIAN POLITICS at The Ouwet Front: A Lebanese Forces Blog

TEST YOUR KNOWLEDGE OF SYRIAN POLITICS

Posted by Lebanonjon

France declares Bashar Al Assad “Persona Non Grata” and severs ties with Syria on public News Channels worldwide, your immediate response is

A. Have Walid Mouallem declare that Syria decided to cut ties with France first but because Syria and France are in different time zones, France’s news came out first.

B. Assassinate the French Consul to Lebanon

C. Assassinate a Charles Aznavour imitator who sings in a French restaurant in Achrafieh

D. Claim that the French are still calling daily and show phone records from the Syrian Ministry of Telecommunications that are impossible to forge without a primitive typewriter

In an interview on CNN ,George W. Bush says he is fed up with Bashar and will not engage Syria until Lebanon is able to elect a President Freely, your most likely reaction is to…..

A. Have ShamPress issue an interview in which Syria announces that it is unwilling to accept American overtures for Syrian diplomats to visit Washington

B. Assassinate a March 14 ranking politician

c. Have Hassan Nassrallah hold a rally in Dahieh in which at least 20 American flags are burned and ” Al Mowto Li Amrika” is chanted for at least 30 minutes.

D. Have Michel Aoun appointed as negotiator for March 8

E. All of the above

Shaker El Absi gets caught in Nahr el Bared by the Lebanese Army , your immediate move is to……

A. Instruct Hassan Nassrallah to claim that the Palestinian camp is a RED LINE

B. Wait for the FPM to start the usual conspiracy theories saying Hariri cancelled checks for Fath El Islam and deactivated their debit cards from his cousins bank.

C. Start problems in Ain El Helwe to divert attention

D. Close the border so the rest of Syria’s paid goons cant run back into Syria to escape and thus implicating their regime

E. Claim that Fath El Islam is really an Al Qaeda group even though Osama Bin Laden himelf in a special movie denied any association with them

F. Tell all the other Syrian thugs to lay low while they figure a way to smuggle Shaker el Absi out.

March 8 Alliance fails to topple the Legitimate Government of Lebanon through riots and tire burning, you must respond, so you

A. Have Nabih Berri close the parliament

B. Have Hassan Nassrallah do another pro bono rally in Baalbek this time to declare that March 8 is protecting the country from civil war by not toppling the government

C. Ship more weapons through Hizballah to the SSNP in a truck covered with hay

D. Claim through Wi’am Wahhab that March 14 is assassinating March 14 leaders

E. Assassinate Pierre Gemayel

F. All of the above

March 14 call your bluff by nominating Michel Sleiman as presidential candidate and there by worrying you that he cut a deal with them, you must respond by……

A. Appoint Michel Aoun as negotiator for March 8

B. Have Nabih Berri insult Bishop Rahi and keep the parliament closed indefinitely

C. Assassinate Brigadier Hajj

D. Complain to France that Syria is putting pressure on March 8, but they won’t listen to Syrian demands

E. Claim that Israel is killing the Politicians by having Hassan Nassrallah give an interview from his rat-hole bunker

Faced with international isolation,an international tribunal and global sanctions against your country, you Bashar Al Assad will…..

A. Claim that you have no influence over March 8 through your very own Baghdad Bob: Walid Mouallem

B. Send Syrian diplomats to meet with two useless democrat senators and publicize it as if USA was begging you to be friends

C. Instruct the March 8 alliance to block all roads and ports and the airport in the hope that civil war will finally erupt

D. Have all the March 8 members declare that Michel Aoun is the big boss, knowing that if anyone can start a war, its the orangutaoun

E. Pray that the Assassination attempt on Saniora is successful

Filed under: Other
Posted by Lebanonjon on 01.06.08 @ 11:41 pm |

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19 Comments. Add your own...

1. Tarek | January 7th, 2008 at 2:55 am

looooool! funny and sad but true!
2. Ali1559 | January 7th, 2008 at 6:11 am

To protect our kids , this situation needs to change .
It’s no wonder other nations have a bad attitude toward us. The above post shows what kind of hater lebanonjon is …

Where is the common sense lately?? Nothing but a BLABLABLAAA …. Grow up !!
3. Lebanonjon | January 7th, 2008 at 6:31 am

The truth is killing you Ali eh?

Thats the only medicine for you March 8…..a dose of the truth puts you in deir el saleeb..with guess who??

hahahahaha

yalla hallop
4. Johnny.B | January 7th, 2008 at 8:52 am

Ali 1559,

I think the best way to protect our kids, is NOT to wage war whenever we feel that samir l-ontar is bored in prison :P:P:P
5. Rodge | January 7th, 2008 at 10:32 am

Lebanonjon,

You efforts and writings are much appreciated, and please don’t listen to bad critics. Keep it going, in my opinion, u’re bringing a good addition here
6. Michele | January 7th, 2008 at 12:35 pm

Lebanonjon chapeau!!!!

BTW, i did hear that Aznavour might sing in Damascus next summer but still not confirmed…
7. Johnny.B | January 7th, 2008 at 2:05 pm

Michele,

aznavour will sing for bachar el-assad just like najwa karam and wael kfoury AHHAHAH
8. Michele | January 7th, 2008 at 3:58 pm

And the sad thing there are still lot’s of Lebanese who like them.

What a shame!!!!!!!
9. Abu George | January 7th, 2008 at 4:01 pm

Lebanonjon,

I must agree you have a different way to state your feeling and thoughts about the dilemmas we are going through, but you are a genius in my opinion. You are correct and on the money. Keep up the good work.
10. Rodge | January 7th, 2008 at 4:11 pm

Michele and Johnny,

It seems Aznavour is pro Tashnag
hahahaha

and Michele you were right when u said “the sad thing there are still lot’s of Lebanese who like them”.
I will add that those singers knew this fact and didn’t care about anything, founding that they will not lose anything in return, of course except their self respect, which i doubt they have it in the first place
11. Ali1559 | January 8th, 2008 at 6:02 am

lebanonjon

You think you’re tough enough boy? Let me see you trying …. Killing us is the the way outta this ! Ra2btak minfika

See you in der al salib by next yr , this is when you gonna lose the american support. Hala mara ma fi wizaret difie3 la2 .. fi der al salib iza zamato.. LOOL

bala tihdid ya afandeh …
12. Ali1559 | January 8th, 2008 at 6:04 am

Johnny

Wage a war??? :P … lesh chu ni7na li 3ina tayyarat w dabebet ?? ECHBEK?
13. Michele | January 8th, 2008 at 7:19 am

Ali , quit what u r smoking, obviously it’s bad quality….
14. Michele | January 8th, 2008 at 7:25 am

Yep Rodge, as for myself, i’m definitely boycotting them…

Elissa will remain my favorite
15. philo | January 8th, 2008 at 2:29 pm

dear lebanonjon,
please allow me to be frank with you and state these remarks:

1- your last post about the 5000 liras; when your parents gave you this amount which is BIG!!! in 1988 (it’s almost 25000 lira now) show that you were AT LEAST 10 years old to handle this amount during war-time what means that now you are AT LEAST in your 30’s today!!!

2- i have been reading this blog for almost 2 months i never was convinced of any of your friends comments but the one thing that i noticed that almost all of them has a STRONG personality and very patriotic specially that this blog keep the emigrants in touch with the latest news and my deep respects to that.
but before your last post i thought that you were a 10 years old kid who’s trying to be funny. but unfortunately that’s not the case. your silly and childish comment on this age show’s a person with a very weak personality. you are like the geek that get drunk and make fun of his self just so he can hangout with the guys!
and your cheerleaders like tarek rodge and michele… 3ambyestelmouk !!!

MAN PLZ GROW UP !!!!
stop making fun of urself
you want to help the christians ?? w3a 3a wad3ak and go get married with a woman and bring a lot of kids!!!
16. Michele | January 8th, 2008 at 4:09 pm

Lebanonjon, Philo is 100% right!!!!

I’m one of ur biggest fan!!!!!!

Lebanonjon you ROCK!!!!!!!!!!!
17. Tarek | January 8th, 2008 at 10:36 pm

Hey philo, what’s your problem man?
I really laughed at this post and I liked it!
What do you want man!?
18. Ali1559 | January 9th, 2008 at 4:36 am

Michele

I bought it from achrafiyeh … I always get good deals there!! Would you like some??
19. Michele | January 9th, 2008 at 7:11 am

Tssss, tssss!

Ya Ali, maybe good deals but bad quality…
I’m sure ur guys from the bekaa could provide u with better quality, and u being 1 of them i’m sure u’ll get a good bargain…

Cheer up boy!