1. Nabih Berri of Haraket Amal: A billionaire without any business to run, his money just populates on its own.
2. Hizbulla ministers: wait a minute we need to ask Nasrallah what to do on this new law, wait a minute Nasrallah needs to wait to ask Bashar what to do on this new Law. wait a minute Bashar needs to ask Najjad what to do, give us a week and if it can hurt Israel we will agree on it.
3. Aoun. AKA runaway bride: Don’t ask me how he got this nickname when all he wanted was french coffee and croissant on the day of the invasion.
4. Franjieh: His army of 200 Kebbe makers think they are enough to elect him, not to mention his ability to carry messages from Damascus, he still thinks they don’t arrive when sent by email.
5. Karameh: Akh min hal karameh, he think he represents the sunnis, and even in his hometown, he can’t get elected.
6. Areslan: Who? when did this guy ever appear on anyones list of anything. He is like truly a zero on the left.
7. Zoubran Batheel: Needs more practice but he is getting closer to pronounce ” Ra ee th Al Zoumhourieh”
8. Ibrahim Kanaan: We are peacefully demonstrating and not allowing anyone to go anywhere, then those crazy people who want to go to work attacked us. Why would someone go to work when Micho told them clearly not to ???????

OK now for the Gov statement.
NO more work for anyone, sit in the tents in downtown, protest against anything, you will get the money.
No need to work, we need to liberate shebaa.
We will put all thieves in jail, as long as they are not ministers or have signed an accord with Hizbulla, or AMAL , FPM and they are not shareholders in OTV(the new voice of freedom, featuring 24 hours per day Aouni music such as the famous Aounak jayeeeee min Hizbulla)

Elect us today and you will get a free entry pass to at least 5 wars in the next 10 years.