I was having one of those endless political discussions with a friend of mine, arguing about the US policy in the Middle East, Iran’s intentions etc .. until we were interrupted by a 40-50 year old man who was dining with his wife.

Apparently, he lives in the US and is here on vacation, and follows thouroughly US & Middle East politics, he talked to us about a possible scenario of US launching a surprise attack on Iran during the last week of Easter.

Why is Iran a real threat to the Americans ?

He got us back few years ago when Iran showed its new military speed boats, and how those boats could be used to blow a very strategic and vital oil pipeline coming from KSA and Arab countries. This will cause a general economic crisis and will also affect the Arab countries.

It was a very interesting theory that i havent thought of or read anywhere in the news before, i need to research those boats and this pipeline. I will keep you updated if i find anything.

The man kept apologizing for interrupting us lol, even though we enjoyed his talks .. Whats funny is that we reached one conclusion, that Lebanon is screwed if any of those scenarios occur lol

From the one and only NAYCOLA ..

Hizballah Entrance Examination

Please answer the following divine question with Ashraf fannass honesty.

MULTIPLE CHOICE

In military terms a Divine Victory is one in which:-You lose all of the South up until the Litani river and The Beloved Sayyid is expected to remain hidden underground for another 128 years.
-You fire 4000 rockets into Israel and only About 12 of them hit any kind of man made structure.
-You claim that only 35.24 Fighters lost their lives and yet 688 pairs of yellow she77ata Abu Isba3s are still missing their owners.
-You were able to continue firing rockets even while every home in south Lebanon was turned to rubble.
-Fida Ijro la Sayyid, whatever he says is ok with you.

You are faced with an advancing Israeli Army, what do you do?

-Fire a Katyusha at them and then find a house full of kids and hide in it
-Fire a Katyusha and find a pregnant woman to hug for a few hours
-Wish you would have taken that job camping in martyrs square
-Cry out ALLAH U AKBAR and pull the red cord on your new vest
-Call up the Sayyid and tell him his plan for Israel to invade Lebanon worked

If you had to choose between giving up your weapons and keeping them you would most likely……
-Keep them because the Government is weak and the Shia’s need protection from Saad Hariri
-Keep them because the government is Illegal and your weapons are divine
-Keep them only until Moishe Weinstein stops occupying your uncle Badri’s parking spot in seattle.
-Give them up once the coup d’etat of Lebanon is complete and the Sayyid’s umma has been established
-Keep them and threaten to behead anyone who tries to disarm you

Which is NOT a form of legal democratic expression
-Firing rockets into Israel
-Threatening to break the hand and behead anyone who tries to disarm you
-Establishing an independent ministate in south Lebanon
-Kidnapping western hostages
-Hiding loads of small arms and rockets in trucks carrying hay.

You signed the Memorandum of Understanding strictly because
-Aoun begged the Sayyid to make him president
-You needed a Christian cover for your coup
-Aoun begged the Sayyid to make him president
-You needed a Christian cover for your coup
-Aoun begged the sayyid to make him president

The man has over a million books in his library, he has been collecting books about everything since he was 7 years old back in 1925 !!!

Abdo Mourtada el Husseini died a month ago.

He refused all offers to sell the Library and move it to Beirut, he got an offer from the Kuwaiti government, and another from Rafiq el Hariri, but he refused them and insisted the library stays in Baalbeck.

There was an article about him in Al-Akhbar today.

This article will teach us to appreciate our mothers more.

It is from Assafir newspaper, about a mother “2em 7ssein” who lost her husband early and has been working since then to get her sons a proper education and a proper life.

عـن أجمـل الأمهـات فـي عيدهـن
أم حسين التي «تعاقدت» مع الطبيعة لتطعم ولديها

لم تعدم أم حسين الوسيلة لتأمين لقمة العيش لها ولولديها اللذين تركهما أبو حسين في عهدتها، بعدما غادرهم ـ والدنيا ـ باكراً إثر مرض عضال ألمّ به وهو في ريعان الشباب. هكذا نظمت المرأة الستينية عقداً عرفياً مع الطبيعة، للاستفادة من خيراتها، تبعاً لقائمة الحشائش البرية الموسمية التي تجمعها يومياً. تسوقها لزبائنها الذين لم يبخلوا عليها يوماً بتلبية طلب أو بسد حاجة عند الضرورة، لا سيما في فصل الشتاء عندما تتباطأ دورة عملها، وتضطر إلى استهلاك «قرشها الأبيض». ففي مثل هذه الأيام الغائمة، تتراكم على كاهلها الأقساط المدرسية، وتكلفة مازوت التدفئة، فضلاً عن متطلبات الاستشفاء والأدوية وغيرها.

Read the rest here.

A friend told me this joke, just got it by email .. very funny !

Bill Gates decides to organize an enormous session of recruitment for a new chairman for Microsoft Europe. The 5000 candidates are all assembled in a large room. One of the candidates is Fadi Khoury, a Lebanese guy

Bill Gates thanks all the candidates for coming and asks that all those who do not know JAVA program language rise and leave.

2000 people rise and leave the room. Fadi Khoury says to himself - ‘I do not know this language but what have I got to lose if I stay? I’ll give it a try’.

Bill Gates asks all the candidates that those who have never had experience of team management of more than 100 people rise and leave.

2000 people rise and leave the room. Fadi Khoury says to himself - ‘I have never managed anybody but myself but what have I got to lose if I stay? What can happen to me’? So he stays.

Then Bill Gates asks all the candidates who do not have excellent management diplomas to rise and leave. 500 people rise and leave the room.

Fadi Khoury says to himself - ‘I left school at 16 but what have I got to lose if I stay? So he stays in the room.

Lastly, Bill Gates asks all of the candidates who do not speak the Serbo-Croat language to rise and leave. 498 people rise and leave the room. Fadi Khoury says himself - ‘I do not speak Serbo-Croat but what the ‘Hell! - Have I got anything to lose?’ So he stays in the room. He finds himself alone with one other candidate - everyone else has gone.

Bill Gates joins them and says: ‘Apparently you are the only two candidates who speak Serbo-Croatian, so I’d now like to hear you both have a little conversation in that language!

Calmly Fadi turns to the other candidate and says to him: ‘Keifak ya habil’…

The other candidate answers: ‘Kol **ara ya manyouk……’

Baddo yekilla kaff mrattab min Bernadette …

No one can deny there have been optimistic views on the chances of resolving the current crisis in Lebanon and i must say it looks like both parties have reached a solution announced by Berri yesterday that i find reasonable and should be adopted to calm both teams and regain the trust of the international community and reboost the country’s economy ..

-A government of 19+11, with a signed paper from the Opposition that they will not resign or not attend meetings.

-The opposition agreement on the tribunal but after discussing few modifications.

Those are the general points, what is left now is to decide the shares of the CHristians from both sides, this will cause some problems but i say let it be 50-50 and thats it ..

I hope this crisis will end once and for all, KSA has done an immense effort which gave its results or hopefully will do so … I am just fed up with all thats happening, just want Lebanon to come back to normal ..

What really ticks me off these days is listening to an 8th Marchist debating that Syria hs left Lebanon and that it hs absolutely nothing to do with the current crisis…

despite the fact that not more than 2 days ago, Bachar was offering his services to KSA to solve the situation in Lebanon…

despite his constant demands for a national unity govt and other perks that seem to coincide with M8ths demands if not preceed them altogether… 

Is he dictating what should be done? nooooooooo 7asha wa kalla…3ayb hal 7aki

Let’s see what has Assad achieved? in two years, he has succeeded in diverting the Lebanese demands from justice to internal bickering over details like a minister or two…

If I recall in March 14 2005, ALL the Lebanese were united in demanding that Syria leaves and that justice be finally done, not only for Hariri but for ALL the crap that Syrian goons had subjected the country to during 30 years of occupation…

Syria did pull out militarily…it was wiser to do so in light of the situation at the time, moreover it was reassured by a group of people took the streets on March 8 to assure Syria of their undying support and that it would always have a place in their collective and individual hearts…this group was later to become known as “the opposition”

Syrian pullout in April 2005 gave the green light for operation “divide and conquer” to start…Aoun who had established channels with Lahoud and his govt of the time was allowed to come back. In parallel, and this MUST NEVER BE FORGOTTEN, the attempts to free DSG from his prison cell were sabotaged by that same govt and its Syrian henchmen…

Aoun came with his talk about corruption and audit with a very specific target set in mind and that was to break up the M14 alliance…

Just a note to any remaining aoun supporters out there: you do not make a change by attacking head first…especially in light of the events of the time…

Nevertheless, aoun kept his talk of wanting to take every one to court, cleaning up the govt etc…Charming talk I must admit, yet history did prove that it was the least of his concerns…

the quadruple alliance was an attempt by M14 to counter act this since they knew aoun still enjoyed massive support in the Christian street and they knew, from history, that this support was increased by two factors: aouns speech of anti corruption and the absence of Geagea… the latter carried much more weight since many rumors were spread that Geagea was helpless, was being controlled, was no longer able to take decisions, and I am sure the members of the forum will recall other similar allegations…

another reason for the quadruple alliance was a last ditch attempt by M14 to split up M8 by taking in Hezbollah and Amal from it and bringing them “over from the cold” so to speak…something like a retaliation for Syria’s aounistic trick…

Anyways…one must hand it over to bachar… he is the son of his father in the sense that he has managed to keep his control over certain Lebanese factions ensuring him the ability to control the political scene at will…

and he is using this control in full force as the threat of the international tribunal becomes more and more imminent.

one just has to follow ALL the events from Feb 14th 2005 to this very day…

1- the string of assassinations of key M14 leaders…what other aim did it have except to intimidate this movement into submission?

2- the July war…it was hoped that it would be the entry to a new civil war in Lebanon…civil war that would keep both our neighbors at ease: no court to worry bachar who stays in power thus guaranteeing there would be no Islamic regime setup at the borders of Israel…a regime that could harm it if it were to openly support the radical Palestinian factions…

3- bachars speech soon after the war ended and his plans for sparking off a civil war had flopped…if i remember correctly, he was the first to accuse the govt of being israeli agents and he was the first to come out with the story of the M14 people helping israel against HA

4- the pullout of the HA ministers from the govt and the circus about sharing the decision making (gee they woke up to it after nearly 1.5 years…wooow) this was hoped to undermine the govt causing it to collapse

5- The sit in when everything else failed…another means of pressuring the govt into resignation

6- January 23rd which was an attempt to gain control of more strategic places other than Down Town, and occupy them leading to paralysis of the country and therefore th collapse of the govt…Also in vain

And the list goes on and on and on…

And still I will see someone come out and claim that Bchar is not interfering in Lebanon…there is no blinder than he who does not wish to see

This is what happens when you flee your country instead of defending it and resisting the invadors .. And i hope no one will come blame it all on the Israelis, they are most to blame but they were the invadors just like the Syrians and Palestinians were in Lebanon … yet thousands died and Lebanon stayed ..

I remember reading during the July war about Drug traffic Hezbollah was involved in with Israel, i dont know about that but the ‘cleanest’ and most ‘honest’ terrorist group Hezbollah is protecting the Hasheesh production in the Bekaa and it is no surprise that they’d be selling them ..

But i must admit, katter kheiroun they only sell the Lebanese hash, wataniyye

This article was published on the 9th of January 2007 in the Sierra times.

Arabic Version:

Few excerpts from the original Article:

Most troubling was the fact that part of the profits made from the illegal enterprise were given to Hezbollah, a designated foreign terrorist organization (DFTO), according to the indictment

The indictment charges that between 1996 and 2004, a group of individuals worked together in a criminal enterprise to traffic in contraband cigarettes, counterfeit Zigzag rolling papers (used for rolling marijuana cigarettes), and counterfeit Viagra; to produce counterfeit cigarette tax stamps; to transport stolen property; and to launder money.

The enterprise was international in scope and operated from Lebanon, Canada, China, Brazil, Paraguay and the United States.

Also named in the indictment and awaiting a January 7, 2007 trial dates are: Karim Hassan Nasser, 37, of Windsor, Ontario; Fadi Mohamad-Musbah Hammoud, 33, of Dearborn, Mich.; Majid Mohamad Hammoud, 39, of Dearborn Heights; Jihad Hammoud, 47, of Dearborn; Ali Najib Berjaoui, 39, of Dearborn; Mohammed Fawzi Zeidan, 41, of Canton, Mich.; and Adel Isak, 37, of Sterling Heights, Mich.

Others charged in the indictment, who are currently wanted as fugitives and believed to have left the United States are: Imad Mohamad-Musbah Hammoud, 37 of Lebanon, formerly of Dearborn; Hassan Ali Al-Mosawi, 49, of Lebanon; Hassan Hassan Nasser, 36, of Windsor, Ontario; Ali Ahmad Hammoud, 64, of Lebanon; Karim Hassan Abbas, 37, formerly of Dearborn; Hassan Mohamad Srour, 30, of Montreal, Quebec; Naji Hassan Alawie, 44, of Windsor, Ontario; and Abdel-Hamid Sinno, 52, of Montreal, Quebec.

Makki pleaded guilty in 2003 in federal district court in Detroit to racketeering and providing material support to Hezbollah. Some of the cigarettes were supplied to the organization by Mohamad Hammoud, who was convicted in 2002 in federal district court in Charlotte, NC, of, among other crimes, racketeering and providing material support to Hezbollah.

This ad was banned few years ago in Lebanon since it disrespected the Lebanese people ( thats what i heard at least), well honestly it is true and i suggest we post more ads such as those barke bi7esso 3a dammoun the kind of people who throw stuff from their cars ..

A woman fell to the ground, General Aoun saw what happened and rushed to help her.

He gave her a hand to stand up again, the woman was pretty grateful.

While she was thanking him, aoun looked at her and said : “Remember me during the elections”.

With a light smile the woman replied: “General, I fell down on my ass, not on my head”

YOU MIGHT BE A AOUNY –Proposed by LebanonJon

1. When you photoshopped your school report card, Instead of A’s you put D’s.

2. The only people who showed up at your birthday party were shiites. And a driver from hizballah paid them each fifty dollars to stick around.

3. After getting an F in physical education, you hired a snoopy to rig your teachers car with explosives

4. You Scream and spit and shout when people make noise during Aouns press conferences on tv.

5. You have vague unclear memories of trying to Kick syria out of Lebanon but you can’t be sure since you now since you can only hear an echo of ” Al mowto li amrika” ringing in your 3 remaining brain cells

4. You hate Samir Geagea with an uncontrolable inhuman intolerant fanatic rabid fundamentalist racist megalomaniacle schizophrenic murderous passion and you call that feeling : simple Logic.

5. You joined your Hezbollah friend in what you thought was a Rallye Paper and it turned out to be the assasination of Pierre Gemayel.

6. Your math professor in the Dahieh High School failed you for Subtracting 4000 from 12000 and getting 20,000. And when you told him that you used the Sayyed Hassan Theorem , he immediate changed your grade to an A+.

7. Your first car was a blue Jeep Cherokee, and your buddy from SSNP had it painted orange for you and even changed the License plates.

8. You think the Sunnis are a huge threat to Christians in Lebanon because they want to islamize the country, so you named your son Hassan to show your support for Hizballah in their efforts to keep lebanon democratic.

9. You took a day off to sell your grandfathers antique gold watch to buy Otv shares on margin as you believe it is a sound investment. Then you went back the next day to camping in Martyrs square.

10. You had an HIV test and you came out positive, so you photoshopped it “negative” to show to your girlfriend.

Proposed by LebanonJon

You may be a Syrian apologist if

1. You’ve broken all the buttons on your remote control except the one for Manar TV

2. You have found a recent surge of admiration for Slimy Franjieh even though youve never been to the North, Ehden or even know who the Marada are.

3. You are certain that Hizballah is a Lebanese national resistance and they never ever ever ever fought against fellow Lebanese. You think Terry Anderson and Terry Waite were Israeli commandoes who were legally detained by Hizballah for 11 years.

4. You think accepting the SSNP shows that you are a wise and democratic Lebanese and that people who think they should be banned as a party are thugs and ****** and beneath your lofty Lebanese ideas.

5. You are still in college and you wouldn’t know Dany Chamoun if he visited you as a ghost with a name tag but you still are sure that Samir Geagea killed him.

6. You believe that burning tires in the street ,because the rest of the country refuses to strike, is a legitimate form of freedom of expression. This idea is coming from a man who behaved as a dictator for months when his Job was to caretake the government through presidential elections.

7. You immediately accuse others of doing just what you are doing as soon as anyone asks you how you can ally with the SSNP, HIZBALLAH and Franjieh

8. You find yourself coming up with novel excuses for fairly obvious issues like convincing yourself that their are no more detainees in syrian jails.

9. You know that something is wrong with finding mortars and guns in a truck bound for east beirut but you cannot convert it into Logic that benefits you so you immediately remember the LBC gaurds caught firing guns as an excuse.

10. You have almost convinced yourself that Lahhoud is really not a bad guy and their is a great conspiracy against him. You got this Idea when he hinted that AOun would be a good choice for president.

11. You find yourself admiring Iran for standing up to the great imperialist USA and you are sure that the entire world is wrong and you are right in defending Hizballahs actions.

12. You believe slogans like “Al mowtou li amrika” are just expressions of frustration with US intervention in arab issues, nothing more nothing less.

13. You know that the best way to get Hizballah to disarm is to leave them alone and praise them unabashedly.

14.You have forgotten that over 150,000 lebanese died at the hands of Syrians, Plaestinians or their allies and you still see israel as the greatest and only threat to Lebanon

Proposed by LebanonJon

Its Assad day for syria, Bashar must be pissed
He can’t get his name off Brammertz’s list

While his dad was to Lebanon, a thirty year plague
Only seven years in power ,junior’s off to the hague

He sure botched it this time with the death of Hariri
Despite that perfect alibi; The Arab Conspiracy Theory

It must be the mossad!!, who committed this crime
Why on earth would we kill that treacherous slime?

We’ll leave if we must, but on one condition
We can foment another deadly war of attrition

Lets bring back the General, to do what he does best
And with the Sayyid’s Militia, he’ll finish the rest

Franjieh and his marada, like lions will roar
And Lahhoud will perform like a 2 dollar *****

Karami and Berri , what a pair of aces!!
While the syrian nationalists never leave traces

Those who love Syria are the Oppositon team
they’ll camp in the square as part of the scheme

Burn tires in the street to prove they are real
And When it works ,we can bring back Nasser Andil

It is worth knowing the vision of this lebanese movement which aim is to change the Lebanese System to avoid the problems occuring in Lebanon through Federalism by protecting all people in our Mosaic Country.

Check the videos below

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